The song that keeps playing in my head...

Am so crazy with Sara Bareillas's Love Song.... It keeps playing in my head over and over again! Even my sister loves it... ;) Check out the song here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYXbz7Pu1i0

4 hours to go..

so this is by far, the worst birthday i ever had in my life.. and i gotta say the calls, text messages from friends and family really made me sad.. i received too many calls and text messages that i didnt even bother to pick up or read. these people must think that its one of the happiest days in my life.. but they have no idea.. and i dont blame them...

so, 4 hours to go and counting. one thing for sure, being 27 makes me stronger than ever. i can still smile in tears and no one, no one could ever bring me down.. :)

have a great weekend.

For once..

I don't know what am feeling..

Sad, angry, dissapointed?

I feel like crying but am too mad to cry, you know what i mean? Sigh..

And I've been listening to Eric Clapton's - 'Change the World' for a hundred times.. It has a calming effect on me somewhat... but it doesnt heal the pain..

Its 3.40am... I cant sleep but if I dont, I wont look good in the new dress tomorrow.

Sigh.. life's a pain in the butt.. and am 27 today with no warm fuzzy hugs to go home to..

Anyone buying me this?? Plsss....!!

I want this for my birthday!! It's called 'Diorshow Powder', my preferred color is No. 003 Catwalk Pink. It's a loose powder that combines blusher and luminizer in one.

I spent a fortune last month - bought 3 Dior products (it comes with free make-up) and a dress.. a dress that burnt a hole in my pocket, which altogether cost me almost RM1500.. am not a shopaholic.. its just that sometimes its so hard to resist something that is sooo pretty. anyway, I can't afford to buy the blusher now, not in 2 months though its just RM130!

:( guess i have to wait till March..

I Did a Bad Thing

I really like the novel and here's the synopsis:

Sarah Roberts used to be good.

Then she did something bad. Very bad.

Now, seven years later, she’s trying to make up for her past by leading a respectable life, working as a local newspaper reporter and living with her saintly boyfriend Jonathan. She has no intention of ever doing a bad thing again.

Until Nick walks back into her life.

And suddenly, what’s good and bad aren’t so clear to Sarah any more.

I DID A BAD THING is dark, funny, wicked and true. Because haven’t we all got a guilty secret?

Guess what - I was looking for other novels written by the author.. but unfortunately, this is the first novel she wrote. and yeah being a 'skema' person i am, i wrote an email to Linda Green and asking about her up-coming novel and here's her reply:

Hi Nadia,

Thanks for getting in touch and I'm so glad you enjoyed my novel.

It's great to get feedback from readers - especially those as far away as Kuala Lumpar!

I'm half way through the next novel, similar mix of humour and darker stuff I hope. This time the heroine is a local TV news reporter and a single mum. It's provisionally titled The 'And Finally' Girl and should be published in hardback/export edition in November 08 and paperback April 09, if I get a move on, that is!

Thanks again.

Best Wishes,

Linda Green

BTW, i dun care she called me Nadia instead of Naida.. and spelled Kuala Lumpur wrongly! am just glad she replied ;) guess there's still a kid in me..

Food for thoughts

“Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, do you think God gives them patience, or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If they pray for courage, does God give them courage, or does he give them opportunity to be courageous? If someone prays for family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm, fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?” - from 'Evan Almighty' movie.

Quote

'Don't let someone become a priority in your life when you are just an option in their life. never explain yourself to anyone cos the person who likes you doesnt need it and the person who hates you won't believe it' - Anonymous

We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience. — George Bernard Shaw (if i may say something about my bf :p)

TUNKU ABDUL AZIZ: Our flag still a bargain at RM5.50

I can't agree more with this article. since we're still in Merdeka spirit, it doesnt hurt to do some reality check... luckily i'm not the only one with the opinion. From one of my favourite columnists, Tunku Abdul Aziz.

IN the early 1970s, I took part in a memorable public discussion in Penang on the future direction of Malaysian education.

The late Geoff Leembruggen, then general manager of Malaysian Industrial Development Finance Bhd (MIDF), chaired the meeting.

When it was my turn to speak as a member of the panel of four, I questioned the wisdom of creating special residential institutions of higher education, such as Mara colleges, exclusively for the Malays.

To me, the very idea of a special race-based institution smacked of an educational ghetto where Malay students would live and study in splendid isolation and be cut off from the rest of the Malaysian student community.

I went further. I said that while I understood the political and social imperatives, and the need to increase Malay tertiary student numbers rapidly, I wondered if that was the right way of going about creating a united Malaysia of the future.

I was also concerned at the prospect of Malay students being denied an opportunity to take on "all comers" intellectually. I thought it would be a pity to isolate the Malays and protect them from open competition.

I did not believe that Malays needed crutches if they were given sensible opportunities to bring themselves up to scratch.

It would be all too easy to develop a false sense of one’s own intellectual prowess when one was competing in a closed, restricted educational environment.

Worst of all, to be shut off from engaging socially with non-Malay students was in itself a serious disadvantage for anyone growing up in a multi-racial country.

The reaction of some in the audience to my innocuous remarks took me completely by surprise. One man, in particular, went completely wild, eyes bulging.

I remain convinced to this day that if I had been within striking distance, he would have attacked me physically. "You are anti-national," he thundered.

I would not have minded if he had called me anything else. I was on my feet like a shot, to take him on for his gratuitous comment, when I felt a sudden tug on my right elbow and heard Geoff say in a firm and calm voice, "Don’t go down to his level!" I agreed with Geoff and let it ride.

I am reminded of this unpleasant incident as we step back collectively to reflect upon the passage of half a century during which we have been our own masters, determining the destiny of our country.

There is no question that we have done rather well on many fronts to change the face of our country; outstanding achievements by any measure.

On the debit side, I fear that we have made some policy decisions on education which have been detrimental to national unity and the integration process.

Our policy should not only have been to provide the best education for all of our boys and girls regardless of race but also, more importantly, to have prepared them to think as Malaysians and to contribute to the future development of their country with pride and commitment.

On this score, I am afraid, we have failed. I say this because the non-Malays continue to feel that they are being discriminated against as far as educational opportunities are concerned.

We have made mistakes and we have to unmake them. We cannot allow ourselves to be continually burdened by the baggage of history, a sense of guilt and regret as we enter the next phase of our national life.

We must finish any unfinished business so that we will be free to chart a new course that reflects the larger national interests — rather than selfish, narrow, sectional interests.

The sectarian instincts or emotional impulses to retain the so-called special character of "Chinese-ness", "Malay-ness" or "Indian-ness" must be moderated, if not altogether subordinated, to the demands and imperatives of our country that is still in search of a distinctive "all-Malaysian" identity.

We cannot aspire to be a strong, united Malaysia without each community giving something up and making some small sacrifices along the way.

I believe with all my heart that we must accept diversity as the bedrock of our nation. We have little or no choice in the matter because we are, in a very real sense, a "tangle of races".

For better or for worse, as in a marriage, we have to find accommodation. It is a matter of survival.

Let us make a conscious effort to look for similarities that bind us rather than expending our energies unearthing differences, often of no great consequence, that separate us as people.
Without unity, diversity is merely a physical state or condition in demographic terms.

In a society such as ours, national unity must not be allowed to remain forever in the realm or level of abstractions or ideas, but managed and nurtured carefully to make it not merely a fact but a way of Malaysian life.

It will not be easy and it will take time, but the time to put policies in place that will help bring about the necessary change is now.

Some argue that we have wasted the last 50 years. No, we have not. We have been trying to find the best solutions to our many problems that always accompany the birth of a nation.

The birth itself was relatively easy because just as we were fortunate to have as the principal "midwife of the nation", Tunku Abdul Rahman, whom the colonial government trusted and believed they could do business with. We were equally blessed in the wisdom, goodwill, loyalty and integrity of the other people who supported the Tunku throughout his crucially important constitutional negotiations in London, including the Malayan Chinese and Indian leaders.

But it saddens me to notice that 50 years on, there are many Malaysians who openly say that they have no reason to rejoice.

I will be the first to admit that flying the Malaysian flag does not necessarily signify your patriotism for your country of birth.

It does, however, show your neighbours and friends that you are with them in celebrating a joyous national occasion.

While the prices of many items have risen in the last few years, a well made 6x3 flag of fine synthetic material in fast colours retails at only RM5.50. Need I say more?

And, finally, as I wish all New Straits Times readers a Happy 50th anniversary of Merdeka, let me remind all Malaysians that they should learn to differentiate between their motherland and the government.

We sometimes feel justifiably unhappy with certain official policies, but we should not punish our mother for the sins of our father.

In every society we will find inequalities, injustices, distortions and poverty, and Malaysia is no different.

At least in our country, we enjoy peace and harmony. And we do have a functioning government that has the general welfare of the citizens at heart. Let us fly the flag with pride and joy in our hearts. Merdeka!

p/s: I studied in science boarding school. so i know how it feels being surrounded by bumiputras though they are among the best quality students. all am saying is things could have been better if we let non-bumi to participate. besides, it's a good opportunity for us to get exposed to the multi-racial environment from a young age. we've been talking about 'unite-malaysians' but believe me it's a distance away.. wonder if the govt could ever see things differently.

Did I marry the right person?

During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?" I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said,"It depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"

Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind.

Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love withyour spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.

Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was acompletely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love...

Because it's happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience.But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame theirspouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage forfulfillment.

Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work,a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could.

And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):

THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the __expression "the labor of love."

Because it takes time, effort, and energy . And most importantly, it takes WISDOM . You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specificthings you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships.

Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause andeffect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable. ..you can "make" love.

Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling .

-Anonymous

I Thought I Knew You

Sunday Morning by No Doubt

Sappy pathetic little me

That was the girl I used to be

You had me on my knees

I'd trade you places any day

I'd never thought you could be that way

But you looked like me on Sunday

You came in with the breeze

On Sunday Morning

You sure have changed since yesterday

Without any warning

I thought I knew you

I thought I knew you

I thought I knew you well... so well

You're trying my shoes on for a change

They look so good but fit so strange

Out of fashion so I can complain

You came in with the breeze

On Sunday Morning

You sure have changed since yesterday

Without any warning

I thought I knew you

I thought I knew you

I thought I knew you well... so well

I know who I am, but who are you?

You're not looking like you used to

You're on the other side of the mirror

So nothing's looking quite as clear

Thank you, for turning on the light

Thank you, now you're the parasite

I didn't think you had it in you

And now, you're looking like I used to!

You came in with the breeze

On Sunday Morning

You sure have changed since yesterday

Without any warning

And you want me badly

You cannot have me

I thought I knew you

I've got a new view

I thought I knew you well...oh well

Truth Doesnt Make A Noise.

Brilliant scripts from 'One Tree Hill'.

Mom: So are you going to tell me about the fight or just assume i know about it while i yell at you?
Lucas: Mom, he had it coming. You know, he said....
Mom: No! They called me today. I was certain they had the wrong Scott. And then they told me they had 2 Scotts and i could take my pick. Honestly Lucas, fighting in class. fighting at all!
Lucas: But the guy was being a jerk.
Mom: And this is suddenly a surprise to you? He hasn't been a jerk before?
Lucas: No, he's always a jerk.
Mom: So, why go down to his level?
Lucas: 'Silent'

true indeed. why go down to his level? I've been down that road before. sometimes, it's so tempting to fight back... but in the end, i come to realize, there's no point doing it.. i'll just end up being at his/her level. it's gonna make me no less as bad as her. the real thing is, truth doesn't make a noise. one fine day, the truth will reveal itself... you just have to believe in Karma sometimes, better yet believe in God that He's fair.

so, the next time around if someone provoked you into a fight, question yourself this before ending up making a fool of yourself 'why go down to his/her level?'..

the smart way is... dont let it get into your head. dont even write/talk about it.. cos its not worth a cent... be mature, be wise... act like your age.

Just for the record

I'm officially not fasting today. Yeah that time again. so biasela... few days before that dah pms. sorry Raf, you have to put up with this... :) anyway, i was feeling down for no specific reason (must be the hormone thingy kicked in).. and what i did was... i sent a text message to a few of my friends asking 'what are the things that you like about me?'... n it did scare em off.. thinking i was out of my mind! a few called asking what is wrong with me and trying to cheer me up... and another few replied. n i felt good again, u know... knowing there are people who care for me out there.... its a blessing :)

anyway am gonna write down the replies here... for future reference or future breakdown rather yea..so that one day, i can look back to this entry and remember how good they made me feel :) and u bet.. im smiling while typing this ... ;)

Q : What are the things that you like about me?

Stay true to yourself naida. u have a lot of good qualities. believe me -Alin

Well, leme start wif ur independency, da way u getting along with others, ur charming and cute characters etc etc honestly im not gd in putting dat in words but believe me da list will go on :) hope this will boost u up... come on cheer up, gal!... ;) - Rauf

You're affectionate, caring, gentle, sweet. i think you're a nicely balanced person and you'd make a wonderful partner. most guys never know how lucky they are - Azmi

Smart, intelligent, gentle, caring, very considerate - Ben

Quote

'There are two doors in Life, one marked "Security" and the other marked "Freedom." If you choose the first, you lose both'. -Anonymous

Do Opposites really attract?

Good article for the 'Opposites-Attract' couples. Taken from Cebu Daily News.

WE’VE heard it all before. Guy meets girl. They like each other. They go out. After a while, however, they’re caught in a rut. What attracts us to particular people can be totally different from how we are compatible to them. Two people can love each other dearly, respect and admire each other, yet not move in the same direction. The most important aspect of a long-term relationship is having mutual goals, values and principles in life. That ensures that the two of you will be moving in the same direction and will be able to offer each other companionship and support (not opposition) along the way.

Opposite personalities could work out in the long term (thank God, this is so enlighting). For the most part, ensuring open communication lines is key to a steady relationship. No one can claim to have a smooth one -- the road to commitment is oft littered with bumps and skid marks. Take the case of Katrina dela Costa, 27. She's been thinking of "the next step" (marriage) with her boyfriend of four years, "but from our discussions about the future, we increasingly seem to be mismatched. I am pretty ambitious and want to work hard to create a good life, including owning a nice car, having dinner with friends at posh restaurants, traveling to Maldives with our puppy ... My boyfriend, however, wants a simple life. He wants to stay at home after work, cook dinner and watch episodes of 'Lost.' My friends tell me how lucky I am to get such a down-to-earth guy, but I find myself wishing he had more drive in life and ambitions that match mine. I'm tired of being the leader in this relationship. I know we both love each other dearly, but is there really any future for two people with such different outlooks on life?"

Many people decide to settle down, hoping that they will change the person, or that in time, because the person loves them so much, they will decide to change themselves. This seldom happens. Sometimes a person does grow or change, but never because someone else wants them to. Personal growth and development only arise from an individual's experiences and can take many years to unfold.

To enter marriage - or any long-term relationship - with the hope of changing your partner is a great mistake that can cause friction, conflict, and frustration within the relationship and feelings of low self-worth for your partner. When you feel your mate is not the kind of person you want to be with, the other person feels that nothing they do can ever make you happy. But there may be nothing basically wrong with your mate - just with this particular match. In fact, your mate could very well make someone else quite happy, and you could be satisfied as well with someone who had more of the qualities that you want in a relationship.

On Katrina's case, she needs to focus on how independent she is, more than how she can get her boyfriend to settle down and spend more time outside of the home. The reason is that in a relationship, partners need to be both close to each other and independent, too. A partner that is cheating is a different scenario. This is all about different personality traits or even ambitions that may polarize couples to the other side of the fence. For example, one half of a couple is dedicated to a career. The other is perfectly happy having a job and staying in the comforts of the home.

It's normal for people to sacrifice time with their partner when long-range goals are on the line. If you cling to the person too much, you impede his growth, and that doesn't help. Worst-case scenario is that he or she'd feel suffocated.

If one partner is clingy, the best thing that person can do is to find out what his long-term goals are. Imagine yourself five years from now. If you can't do that, start brainstorming about where you might want to end up. Or if you can see that far down the road, examine whether your happiness will depends upon another person's love. The truth is that you will never be happy if your satisfaction depends on another person. Come up with at least three things that you can achieve for yourself by yourself.

You can start with short-term remedies. Right now, develop your closeness with friends and do things that are meaningful to you, so that you can develop your identity separate from your significant other. A relationship should be two full whole people, sharing with each other. When he's busy studying, you can be growing and working on yourself!

What you need and want in a long term is not there in your present situation. If you realize this now, you will save the both of you a lot of grief and struggle later on. Make sure you let your partner know that this has nothing to do with your love for him but that your life forces are pointed in different directions. There is a beautiful saying that goes, "Love is wanting for the other what he wants for himself, even though you may not be the one able to give it to him."

*** there are some things that you just have to live with and adapt, if you love the person strong enough. its hard to do but he's the man you chose. so accept, face and live with it. most importantly, adapt positive attitudes. i believe, positive attitudes/outlook of life will get you somewhere. As one of my good friends says, 'happiness is a state of mind' .

Can Men and Women Be Friends #2

Another interesting scripts from 'When Harry Met Sally'

Harry: You realise of course that we can never be friends.
Sally: Why not?
Harry: What I'm saying is... and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form, is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.
Sally: That's not true, I have a number of men friends and there's is no sex involved.
Harry: No you don't.
Sally: Yes I do.
Harry: No you don't.
Sally: Yes I do.
Harry: You only think you do.
Sally: You're saying I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
Harry: No, what I'm saying is they all want to have sex with you.
Sally: They do not.
Harry: Do too.
Sally: They do not.
Harry: Do too.
Sally: How do you know?
Harry: Because no man can be friends with a woman he finds attractive, he always wants to have sex with her.
Sally: So you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive.
Harry: Nuh, you pretty much wanna nail'em too.
Sally: What if they don't want to have sex with you?
Harry: Doesn't matter, because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.
Sally: Well I guess we're not going to be friends then.
Harry: Guess not.
Sally: That's too bad. You are the only person I knew in New York.

Can Men and Women Be Friends #1

Scripts taken from my favourite movie, 'When Harry Met Sally'

Harry: Would you like to have dinner?
(Sally looks over)
Harry: Just friends.
Sally: I thought you didn't believe men and women could be friends.
Harry: When did I say that?
Sally: On the ride to New York.
Harry: No no no no, I never said that. (Harry pauses, thinks.) Yes, that's right, they can't be friends. Unless both of them are involved with other people then they can. This is amendment to the earlier rule, if the two people are in relationships, the pressure of possibilty of involvement is lifted. (Pauses) That doesn't work either because what happens then is the person you're involved with can't understand why you need to be friends with the person you're just friends with. Like it means something is missing from their relationship and "why do you have to go outside to get it?". Then when you say, "no no no no, it's not true nothing's missing from the relationship", the person you're involved with then accuses you of being secretly attracted to the person you're just friends with, which we probably are, I mean, come on, who the hell are we kidding, let's face it, which brings us back to the earlier rule before the amendment which is men and women can't be friends, so where does that leave us?
Sally: Harry.
Harry: What?
Sally: Goodbye.
Harry: Oh, OK.